Disconnecting,

detaching, letting go, whatever you want to call it, is one of the hardest things that I've ever dealt with. Staying friends is what I want, but I never knew how much "just being friends" could hurt. When you're with someone for so long, the way you are around them gets settled in. And when you break up, all of that changes, sometimes instantly. We can never go back to the way we were (although I wish that we could, more than anything), because things never happen the same way twice. I never wanted this, but maybe it's for the best. I'm picking up the pieces. I'm trying to make sense of all of this. I'll get better, I just need time to heal.

Focus

I'm actually taking school seriously this semester. I've been getting all my assignments in, usually way before the deadline. I'm hoping that this could be an all A's semester. I'm taking initiative in other areas too. I have a job interview at Hollister this Saturday at 3:30pm. I'm praying that it goes well. I hope that I get the job; I could really use the money. I've put in so many applications already, if this doesn't work out then I suppose I'll just have to keep looking.